Date Published: March 6, 2025
Life is made up of choices, and each path we take shapes our future in ways we can’t fully predict. But sometimes, when we step far enough away from a path we could have taken, we can clearly see where it would have led.
If I had stayed in Georgia instead of choosing my Latin America adventure, my life would have unfolded in a completely different way. A life that, at first, might have seemed comfortable and familiar, but ultimately would have kept me stagnant.
This is the alternate reality—the parallel universe—that almost happened.
1. I Would Have Drifted Back into an Undefined Relationship with Mark
Had I stayed, Mark and I would have never fully let go of each other. The comfort of his presence, the familiarity, and the ease of slipping back into old habits would have kept us orbiting around each other.
At first, he would have babysat the boys when I went on dates. But over time, we would have fallen into an unspoken routine. Maybe he would have started sleeping over again. Maybe he would have unofficially moved back in, not because he had chosen me, but because it was easier than being alone.
There would have been no deep reconciliation—no real change. The same emotional distance, the same avoidance, the same unspoken dissatisfaction would have remained.
We wouldn’t have been happy. But we wouldn’t have been miserable either. Just stuck in a lukewarm existence, neither fully together nor fully apart.
2. Dating Would Have Been a Dead-End Road
I would have kept dating, but never with my whole heart. Mark’s presence would have lingered like a shadow, making it hard for me to be truly open to someone new.
When I did meet someone, I would have subconsciously compared them to Mark. And if they weren’t quite right, it would have been too easy to slip back into the safety of Mark’s familiar presence instead of pushing forward toward something better.
And so, my dating life would have become a revolving door—meeting people, feeling a lack of excitement, and eventually finding myself back in Mark’s company, wondering if maybe this was as good as it gets.
3. My Latin America Dream Would Have Slowly Faded Away
I might have compromised and done just Costa Rica for the summer. A short escape, just enough to feel like I was still kind of pursuing my dream. But then, I would have come back to Georgia. Back to my home, back to my routine, back to everything that was safe and known.
And the longer I stayed, the harder it would have been to leave.
There would always be one more project to finish in the house. One more reason to stay. One more excuse to delay my adventure.
Months would have passed. Then years.
And one day, I would have woken up and realized that my dreams of adventure had quietly died, not with a dramatic decision, but through a slow erosion of possibility.
4. The Heartbreaking Realization: Mark Would Never Change
At some point, maybe a year or two down the road, reality would have hit me hard.
Mark was never going to step up. He was never going to fight for me. He was never going to work on himself or give me the deep, emotionally present partnership I longed for.
Maybe he would have been in my life in some way forever. But it would have been as this version of himself—the one who chooses emotional safety over real connection.
Had we unofficially gotten back together, I likely would have had to break up with him again—because the same issues that ended our marriage in the first place would have still been there.
By then, I might have felt like I had wasted years, staying in Georgia, hoping for something that was never going to happen.
What Actually Happened: I Chose Growth
By leaving, I didn’t just leave Georgia. I broke free from a cycle that could have kept me stuck for years.
I removed Mark as my safety net. I cut off the possibility of slipping back into a relationship that would have never truly fulfilled me.
I chose adventure. I chose myself.
And that means I chose no regrets.
Because had I stayed in Georgia, I would have wondered, What if I had left?
But by leaving, I will never wonder, What if I had stayed?
