Every relationship will eventually hit hard times.
That’s not pessimism—it’s reality.
Conflict will come. Life will get heavy. Stress, grief, uncertainty, resentment, boredom… all of it will show up eventually.

And when it does?

I don’t want a man who shuts down.
I don’t want a man who disappears.
I don’t want a man who labels the discomfort “drama” and walks away.
I don’t want another runner.

I want the man who says:

“Let’s fix this.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“This matters too much to quit.”

Not because he’s perfect, but because he’s willing.
Willing to sit in discomfort.
Willing to look at his part.
Willing to stay connected when things aren’t easy.

I’ve lived the other side.

I’ve loved men who pulled away the moment things got real.
Men who smiled through the good times and vanished in the hard ones.
Men who were happy when life was light, but completely unavailable when things got heavy.

They didn’t want partnership.
They wanted comfort.

And as soon as the connection required effort,
they labeled it incompatible, too much, or “not working anymore.”

And they ran.

But I’ve grown.

And now I know—I don’t need ease. I need honesty.
I don’t need smooth. I need stability.
I don’t need constant romance. I need reliable presence.

Because love isn’t found in the perfect days.
Love is proven in the hard ones.

So what am I looking for now?

I want the man who doesn’t just enjoy the adventure—he holds steady through the storms.
A man who doesn’t shut down when I say, “This is hard.”
He leans in. He says, “I know. Let’s face it together.”

I want the man who knows this is what real love is made of.
Not butterflies. Not escapism.
But grit. Vulnerability. And the courage to stay when it’s easier to go.

Because I’m done settling for men who crumble.

I’m done with the ones who want to tag along on the journey but aren’t strong enough to co-lead it.

If I ever choose someone again,
it will be someone who is capable of repair, not retreat.

I want the man who fights for the relationship, not just within it.
The one who doesn’t vanish when the narrative gets messy.
The one who says:

“We’ve hit a hard moment. Let’s rise through it. Together.”

Because love isn’t about avoiding conflict.

It’s about being brave enough to stay in the room.